Question by Taylor: Question about anxiety from abuse?
Well I told my primary care doctor about some problems I’ve been having lately and some of them are related to abuse, so he asked me have you ever been abused? and I said yes I have…. So I could not stop crying and he kept asking questions like when, how old were you, etc. People have no idea how sexual abuse affects someone especially if you can’t tell a soul. This is all new to me, I keep it inside until it builds me up into a self -distructed mess. So I’ve been prescribed anti-depressants which is great but I feel like it’s putting a bandaid on a bullet wound. I just need to let my feelings out because I internalize it all and he makes me comfortable to do so. He’s someone far enough to tell but close enough to trust but is it okay to tell him? because he is a doctor but not a psychologist. So I don’t know if he’s going to be too busy with his flu shots and old people anough to listen. I know what a stupid question but I’ve let him in and now know it makes me feel better. just want to feel better. Any thoughts?
I’m on Wellbutrin right now, just started taking it. But that’s not really my question. I just need to talk to him I don’t know why but he made me feel better with just talking about it for a minute. Would he find it bothersome for me to talk to him? just talk?
For the first time someone looked at me and knew something just wasn’t right and for that I will never forget him. I will talk to him since he is who I’m comfortable with now and he will most likely refer me to a specialist. He might not care as much as I think but it’s a risk I’m willing to take to feel better:) Thanks for the best advice I’ve gotten in awhile.
Sincerely,
Taylor

Best answer:

Answer by Anonymous
Sexual abuse is a serious issue. It traumatizes the mind so much that a person’s life can be forever ruined. I too was a victim. So I know how it feels. It can feel completely paralyzing in that you end up not being able to speak up about what’s bothering you. You then end up focusing all your attention on negative feelings that come up inside, and eventually the result is depression and anxiety.

I’ve struggled with depression and anxiety for years, and I still am today. It’s hurt the relationships I have with not only my family, but also with my friends, my school, and my jobs. I say to people all the time that depression and anxiety kills. So take it from me when I say that seeing an actual therapist can be extremely helpful in addressing the issues that you currently have. You’ve already mentioned that you need to let out your feelings, so in that regard you are definitely on the right track. Understanding what you need to do is the first step, and you’re already there. The second step is finding the right person to talk to on a regular basis.

Like yourself, I first opened up to my primary care doctor when I was a junior in high school. Immediately, my doctor explained to me that she would listen as much as she could, but she made clear to me that there were limitations due to time constraints. The truth is primary care doctors can only see you for a little while because they have so many patients to care for. It’s not that they don’t care about you, but rather the specific field that they’re in does not allow them to listen to you in the manner that a therapist can. So, she suggested that I go see one. Eventually, I got around to it about 2 years ago when I was a senior in college. Needless to say, this was a lot more helpful than talking to my primary doctor. For the next year and a half, each 45 minute session I had with my therapist was like an eye-opener. He helped me understand exactly what I was going through. He helped me dig deep down into my gut, into my deepest feelings, into my heart and mind, and he ultimately helped me understand where my feelings came from and why I felt the way I did. Although I still struggle today, I no longer struggle with as much depression and anxiety. The reason is because my therapist helped me build a solid foundation of coping skills and strategies for which to work off of. That’s what a therapist will do for you. He/she will help you develop skills to handle certain situations that come up in your life. And those are skills that medication can not give you. With that being said, I agree with your feelings about the medication being a bandaid solution to your problems. If you continue to feel that way, I highly suggest seeing a therapist. In fact, I recommend it. Opening up to someone about your issues in the form of a face to face conversation, in my opinion, is a lot more helpful than taking pills, which is something that aims to “alter” the chemicals inside your body so that you no longer feel a certain way (this can cause you to become dependent on it, and you never, ever want to be dependent on a drug). It’s a bandaid solution, as you pointed out. What you need is “surgery”, or a preventative measure, and therapy can provide you with that.

I’ve been mumbling for so long that I haven’t answered your question. Is it okay to tell your doctor about your issues? Of course it is. He will not be bothered. It’s his job to listen and come up with the best care possible. However, as I pointed out, there are time constraints, and so seeing a doctor for your specific problem, I think, would not be the best option. Go see a therapist. They provide you with the kind of one on one attention that primary care doctors can not.

Best of luck to you. You sound like a wonderful person (your question under “Additional Details” implies that you’re extremely thoughtful and considerate of other people). Hang in there, and one day you’ll be happy. Always remember that there are people who care about you, and always, always remember that you’re a special person with lots to offer.

Surround yourself with good people and watch lots and lots of comedy. Kindness and Laughter, respectively, are both healthy for the heart and mind.

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